Monday, March 31, 2014

Full Moon in Virgo Sun in Pisces

So.. I am a few weeks late in posting this one..
I've been feeling....

In preparation for the Full Moon in Virgo...

Recognize Honor
Preserve Personal and family traditions
Maintain a firm base for Future Growth
Remember where we come from
Feel a deep sense of who I am now
Feel the developing future
Self-awareness makes us stronger and less vulnerable.

Open the abundant flow in the Universe and attract money, prosperity and abundance.
Learn the balance between Want and Need
Let go of the old
(possessions, debts and mindsets)
They block the flow of abundance.

Empty the cup to let the cup become full again.

My Virgo is in the 4th house and in Nadir

The 4th house is our Roots, limits, security. This is our Home-where work, feel and experience...
The Core.
The 4th house is a Water element.
Deal with the past and the emotional responses
planets in this house show what is happening on a subconscious level with assimilation of the past and letting go of what holds us back...
Lives in Feelings/yearnings
Emotional and Soul needs
Dominates life/energy
coping mechanisms
Emotional kand Soul.

In my 4th house/Vigo Relationship, everything I am reading says I have strong family ties.
I remember having strong family ties. Lately, my home/family ties have been warped. I lost my father and brother to death and my family was ripped apart. I reclaimed my family bond only to have the bond torn apart again. Death. The old ones pass and the family falls away. I feel a responsibility to my mom, as she lives with me, and I have my son.

I hold them in my home, yet I am still looking for "Where I belong".... I lost my sense of Home. Now is my time to heal.
My Home needs to be healed.

Nadir is ruled by the Moon and is the Home, or Imum Coeli. This is the point where we meet the deepest part of ourselves
The IC represents the nurturing parents or whoever the nurturer was...
The IC is the midnight of the soul and shows the psychological legacy from our parents/grandparents/ancestors submerged in the unconscious until activated. This is the point we we enter the underworld of our internal psyche, turning inward to meet the essence of who we are in this lifetime.
Do a little self examination...
Hidden fears
Hidden Desires                                    ....all are waiting to be discovered
Hidden Dreams
Finding lost parts

Until we are able to embrace and reclaim these parts, we cannot manifest our highness aspirations as shown by the MidHeaven..
IC is the foundation of personality..The Chart and the key to unlocking our personal evolution.

I lit my candles and incense...
Wrote down some things I wanted to release...

1. energy. Negative. while dealing with family and home issues
    This, I release

2. I release and empty my cup. I empty what I know and make room for new

3. I release the lower vibrations living in my past

4. I release my home-sickness

5. I release my (desires) for love, relationships and in releasing desire, I gain energetic connection

6. I release my dreams..so they may be found

7. I release the lost parts of me, for I am found

8. I release my heart, so I may begin to feel

I burned each word and felt the smoke rise in the night time air
The moon shined down upon me and I felt the release.

This whole month has been better at home. I have felt more connected to my family.
I want all parts of me to be free. The hidden to be meditated upon and acknowledged...

When you empty the cup and let go of what you "know"... suddenly you become "filled" with this amazing perspective living all around you!!

I truly enjoy learning about all the amazing perspectives around me!!




Sunday, March 16, 2014

To Be At Zen





I breathe in.. I breathe out..
I visualize the light flowing in through my mouth 
The dark flowing out from my nose.
I quiet my mind and listen.
Breathing in
Breathing out
I feel the ground beneath me
I flow to the rhythmic beat living within the moment
Time becomes no time
There is no past and no future, only NOW
Visions paint pictures and imprint upon my soul
There is peace.
There is  love
There is connection
In this moment
I am whole.

I feel "right"when I meditate. The visions bring answers to questions pertaining to my daily life and I stroll around in the vision looking and listening to the message... I am at Zen. Zen is defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as: a Japanese sect of Mahayana Buddhism that aims at enlightenment by direct intuition through meditation. Zen teaches that the potential to achieve enlightenment is inherent in everyone but lies dormant because of ignorance. It is best awakened not by the study of scripture, the practice of good deeds, rites and ceremonies, or worship of images, but by breaking through the boundaries of mundane logical thought. 

I am not a Buddhist. I am not any one religion. I am Dona. I choose to visit all religions and love the spiritual teachings living within. I recognize the word Zen as a way to feel enlightened and connected with the deep nuances belonging to spirituality. When I am At Zen... I am connected. I am surrounded with light and life and beauty. The intensity is, well...intense and almost over-powering... I revel in what I feel with rejoicing! 

In my Massage Room, I become At Zen. As clients come in to see me, I breathe in and intend to touch with healing and love. I reach to the Light and feel the love flow through my head to my heart and connect with my hands as I touch my clients. The body begins to talk to my hands and I "know" what needs to be done. I "know" what needs to be said. I cannot heal my clients. I can be a conduit for healing. I am able to bring awareness to another soul which enables a healing. I cannot promise what the healing is. I do not take healing's responsibility. Healing will happen as healing needs to happen. The soul. The body. The mind. Personal life. 
Healing and Massage work is my peace. 

and then, 

I go home. My mom lives with me. I have a 13 year old son. Need I say more!!! Okay, I am laughing. 
Daily, I will receive a text from either my son, or my mother complaining about what one or the other is doing. These two people will argue and fight and about almost anything. As soon as I enter the door to my home, I have to settle the dispute. I lose my Zen. I lose my patience. I lose my rationality and become angry. All the high vibrations of love and forgiveness shatter and fizzle down to the lowest of the low and I begin to yell out my frustration at their inability to "get along"!!! 
 I was placing my Zen loss on them. I gave them the blame of my actions to their actions. 

How is this reaction one of a woman who LOVES and works in the Healing realm? 
My reaction to the situation on the home front directly resonates to how my son and mother react to me. I have learned, to be at Zen in a place where there is no CHAOS. 
Now, I am to learn how to be at Zen within CHAOS. 

I was talking to a friend a couple of weeks ago. Twenty years ago, he was a Sailsboat salesman. He traveled the world on a boat. Visiting uninhabited islands and meditating to the sun and ocean on either the island or in the middle of the ocean on the boat. What he said to me, made perfect sense. "it is easy to be at Zen when you are alone on a boat, meditating. To incorporate Zen when I am back at home, is not as easy."  
I considered what he said. My massage room is my boat on the ocean. My Zen is easy to maintain in my place of beauty. 
I decided, to begin practicing my Zen to a higher vibrational degree on the home front while dealing with daily life. 
Breathing in Light
Breathing out Dark...
prior to any words coming out of my mouth. I will seek the light and feel the energy and "Know" exactly what to say. I trust the Light and Intuition while working on other people's lives and bodies... How is it, that I do not do the same in my life, for my family and my own healing? How is it, I have made my life to be less than those I am working on? How do I claim to be a Healer and drive a wedge in my own life? 

My vibrational frequency is my responsibility. My Zen is my responsibility. I cannot place the blame on any other soul for my reaction. My reactions are mine. 

Balancing my light and dark side, is not simple. 
I am always in session with mySelf and learning how to BE....
One of these days, I will get it RIGHT!! ;)





Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Last New Moon (March)(Pisces)

The New Moon in Pisces brought me to a place of awareness. I often create goals which are wonderful, yet so long ranged...I have a difficult time completing them in a decent timespan.

I decided to make some short term goals which are achievable, calculable, and completely doable.
I WILL achieve weight loss.
10 lbs in 30 days
At lease 3 inches lost at waist, hips and bust...

I will Run 1 mile (without huffing and puffing)
20  pushups
20 squats
and 5 minute planks...

I will remind myself, daily...
I am FIT and LUSCIOUS
My body is toned
and well maintained.

I rechecked my weight and inches at the 1st quarter moon, which was on Saturday night...
I have lost an inch around my waist, hips, and bust... and around my thighs...
and 2lbs... YEAH!! I am on the right path...
My running has become less huff and puff...and my endurance for the the complete workout has become much better!

*********************************************************************************

I also decided to check to see where Pisces was in my Chart and use this as a type of classroom...
Pisces is in my 10th house.
The 10th house has to do with social status/career..
Learning to Serve
Within the Mystical Realm to those in need..

Midheaven has to do with Goal Completion within my line of work. I have learned to balance stress within my career and I tend to take the backseat and do more for others than I do for myself.
I am seeing how I need to focus on MY aspirations and work on my needs... for balance..
My helping others often overwhelms the helping for myself.
*I am working toward harmonizing with spiritual clarity.

My Lilith is also in Pisces..
Lilith shows Dreams, fantasies, utopia, infinity, good friend, intuitive, and addictive personality...
She is a shapeshifter who is typically in the shadows.. well, Lilith in Pisces and Pisces in my 10th house, she likes to be seen.. My shadows are not hidden... LOL.. go figure.
Her Power is in Building up
Her Poison is in breaking down...
My learning is the balance for Truth...


Above all...My life is seeking balance.
I am good to my friends and loved ones...often I am so good that I put my Life on hold... I begin to look at what matters most to them and forget what matters most to me. This, is not a balanced life. My balance is rocking on this boat and I don't know how to keep her from sinking.

so, today... I feel kinda sad.
I recognize the unbalance... I am glad I am able to "see"... and begin to add support beams to my life.
I will update again as time progresses.
Namaste...