A few days ago I decided I needed to burn my dead roses.
They were given to me on my birthday last year. The year I turned 39. They were given on the evening of a date.
The date was a preempt to sex. A sexual relationship. I dried the flowers and put them in a vase for display. I love dead roses.
The"relationship" began to deepen and the other party did not want a deeper relationship with me. This was a "taboo" relationship...I had to keep the sexual relationship a secret.
And, of course...it ended...
I have kept the display, and every time I see the roses, I consider what could have been and remember the words spoken... the feeling of being involved and how it felt so right and good... the emotions were a lie. A big fat lie.
Every time I look at them, I fell the energy of the"let down" ... I let myself down. I let myself fall into the emotions webserver I knew the whole thing was only supposed to be sex...
I've gotten passed this...yet the energy remains...and I know burning the roses will be a wonderful way to release the negativity about relationships.
Every time I see the roses I am instantly reminded of every foiled relationship..I have grown passed this and need the energy gone...
And, so it is done...
With fire, air, water and sent to the sky..
Incense purge me, while the air folks me with NEW..
Releasing...
To be filled...
They were given to me on my birthday last year. The year I turned 39. They were given on the evening of a date.
The date was a preempt to sex. A sexual relationship. I dried the flowers and put them in a vase for display. I love dead roses.
The"relationship" began to deepen and the other party did not want a deeper relationship with me. This was a "taboo" relationship...I had to keep the sexual relationship a secret.
And, of course...it ended...
I have kept the display, and every time I see the roses, I consider what could have been and remember the words spoken... the feeling of being involved and how it felt so right and good... the emotions were a lie. A big fat lie.
Every time I look at them, I fell the energy of the"let down" ... I let myself down. I let myself fall into the emotions webserver I knew the whole thing was only supposed to be sex...
I've gotten passed this...yet the energy remains...and I know burning the roses will be a wonderful way to release the negativity about relationships.
Every time I see the roses I am instantly reminded of every foiled relationship..I have grown passed this and need the energy gone...
And, so it is done...
With fire, air, water and sent to the sky..
Incense purge me, while the air folks me with NEW..
Releasing...
To be filled...
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